ENTJs – Are they really the bad guys?

Author

felyn.yip

Author

Most ENTJs become direct leaders, and because of their style, get accused of being the ‘bad guy’. Truth is, ENTJs know what they want, and they go after it in the most pragmatic way possible. Because of their high confidence in themselves and their ability to make things happen, ENTJs get misconstrued as arrogant, brash and overbearing.

 

This, of course, is off-putting to other personality types. Their determined minds and resolute desire to achieve those goals comes across as ruthless or overbearing because it is so unlike most of the other types.

 

It’s important to know that just because they have a naturally dominant personality, they are not heartless people. They have the same love and desire to help people, but simply express it differently from others.

 

It’s important to recognise that just because they have a dominant personality, ENTJs are not heartless. In fact, they respect when others hold their own about things that matter, so long as it is based on facts that the ENTJ can see.

 

Of course, this is not to say ENTJs have no weaknesses. When they are working, ENTJs can come across as impatient, self-centered or intolerant of others.

 

But today, we want to debunk this myth of them being the bad guys. We want to set straight some misconceptions people have about ENTJs.

 

Misconception: ENTJs are too self-centred to be an effective leader.

 

Driven by their desire for excellence, ENTJs naturally take leadership roles or strive for the highest of positions. They are active communicators and make themselves heard in every situation.

 

People mistake this for self-centeredness, feeling that the ENTJ only speaks for themselves and their own agenda. This may be true for some ENTJs, but also true for many other personalities out there.

 

Truth is, ENTJs think for the overall growth and well-being of organizations, and sometimes the decisions they make can appear sacrificing individuals’ well-being. But all in all, they are utilitarian, looking out for the most benefit for the largest group of people. People may disagree with their approach, but ENTJs are unapologetic about the way they go about solving problems.

 

Misconception: It would be impossible to work with an ENTJ.

ENTJs come across has brash, unforgiving of mistakes and quick to judge. This makes them appear hard to work with. It’s here that people come to believe that it is impossible to work with them.

 

Actually, ENTJs welcome input of any sort, especially one that challenges their viewpoint. ENTJs like being challenged, and when their team or colleagues challenge their viewpoint, they get stimulated and engaged. This is because they believe that any good idea needs to be challenged to be refined and proven.

 

People who understand that find that working with ENTJs to be a delight. There’s a strong exchange of ideas, but nothing is personal. It’s all about the validity of the ideas and whether they work. If you can leave aside your personal feelings, working with ENTJ can be good for your personal and professional growth.

 

Misconception: Being in a relationship with an ENTJ would be impossible.

 

ENTJs are known for being a little out of touch with emotions and can risk being insensitive. However, as a partner, their confidence can serve you well as they are always looking for ways to improve themselves and the way they showcase their love.

 

ENTJs are very open to feedback. If you’re the partner, they will take what you say seriously and look for ways they can improve themselves. This can be rather delightful; how many partners do we know are willing to actively change themselves to be better?

 

Hence, ENTJs often start out rough in the edges. They aren’t the best first dates, or adept at saying the right things at the start. What’s important is that they are committed to the process of improving and becoming better for you.

 

Misconception: You can’t show emotion around an ENTJ.

 

At first sight, ENTJs look ruthless and cannot care less about your feelings. They can look like people without a heart.

 

ENTJs actually have emotions just like everyone else. But because they’re not used to using it in their decision-making, they tend to be more awkward when having to access their emotions or show their emotions. Often, it may come out in an uncontrolled fashion, which is why ENTJs tend to avoid it more. Mature ENTJs, however, know how to manage their emotions together with their logic.

 

Also, in the making of decisions, especially corporate ones, ENTJs don’t see emotions or people’s feelings as a valid point to consider. After all, what is best for the organization is regardless of how people feel about it. This is true from a logical standpoint. However, people who don’t understand this about the ENTJ tend to just label them as emotionless, heartless creatures.

 

All in all, ENTJs have a reputation of being very hard to be with. This is true, if you don’t know how to engage them. In the end, they are like everyone else, doing their best and making sure they are faithful and excellent in their tasks.

 

If you can embrace the natural weakness of the ENTJ, you’ll enjoy their natural strength of leadership, clear goals and resoluteness toward their dreams.

 

Have you understood your ENTJ friend/partner better now? Comment below to share your experience with us! 

 

5 Tips for Dating an ESFP Personality

Author

felyn.yip

Author

Dating an ESFP? Lucky you!

 

ESFPs are fun-loving, charismatic and generous people.  Approachable at all times, they want to make every moment with your count. Nothing too serious, and nothing too heavy. They just love having you and spending time with you.

 

However, ESFPs are often misunderstood. Their playful nature may imply to some that they’re not serious nor committed to the relationship. Yes, that is the case if you’re constantly trying to ‘tie them down’.

 

But if you love your ESFP partner and want to settle down long-term with him or her, here’s what you can do to make them happy:

 

Do fun stuff together.

Think of social and fun stuff to do.  ESFPs like to engage in many things at one time as they are energetic and sociable. Their lives are always packed with enjoyable activities, socialising, friends and work.

Watching a football game with enthusiastic fans or go dancing at a nightclub appeals to them. Nothing too serious, too deep or abstract.

 

Keep them hooked

It’s very easy for ESFPs to lose focus and get bored when there are no new things around them. Because of this, they tend to look elsewhere, and that might also give them a reputation for jumping from one relationship to another. So if you’re dating them, try to keep them hooked and engage in different activities at one time.

It’s a good idea to invite your partner to learn something creative and new like music, dance, cooking, a wine appreciation club or an amateur theatre group. Most of them are also interested in team sports so you can go for a para-jumping group or rowing team for couples. The whole point is to keep them involved in new things so that they don’t look for thrills elsewhere.

 

Don’t grudge them the limelight

ESFPs are most of the times at the centre of groups, work, and social situations.

They are exceedingly popular owing to their easy-going and friendly nature. So don’t be disturbed if once in a while your partner has a calendar packed with events whether it includes you or not.

It might be difficult to understand initially but try to make your own plans with friends or reading a book at home. The point is to give them space and not to make them feel that they only can spend time with you.   

 

Appreciate their generosity

There is no doubt how generous and warm ESFPs are. They will initially sweep you off your feet with their desire to please you. They will go to great lengths to make their partners happy. You are likely to get a lot of surprises from your ESFP partner.

Sometimes, this nature can lead to extravagant buying. Instead of chastising them, appreciate their exuberant natures and generosity. Gently remind them that they can be more moderate in their purchase in the future.  

 

Encourage light discussions

ESFPs like it when they can have fun and enjoyable discussions and avoid places where people are judgemental, critical and negative.

Build an atmosphere which is positive with no conflict. Make sure you don’t use a harsh or critical stance when discussing an issue. Approach any matter constructively and cooperatively to encourage non-judgmental dialogue.

 

Are you an ESFP? Share this post with your friend, so they learn more about you!

 

Dating an ESFP? Comment on this post to share your experience or share your story in the Story section of the website!

6 Travel Experiences for Introverted Dating Couples

Author

felyn.yip

Author

Many introverted couples turn out to have a successful long-term relationship usually because they share similar interests and level of understanding.

Planning travel places require a conversation between the couple as to which places will fuel and recharge both of you. Well, we’ve made things easier for you.

Here’s a guide to 6 best travel experiences for introverted dating couples:

 

Beach getaway at Viceroy Riviera Maya

It is a secluded escape on the Caribbean Sea in Mexico with Mayan-inspired spa treatments and calm surroundings. Hit this place when it’s not crowded.

 

If you have a good budget, go for a luxury villa with private pool and outdoor terrace. The villas are surrounded by tropical jungle gardens and are private. This unique resort is a great place to visit and the most romantic beach getaways in Mexico.

 

Treat your partner and send them to spa treatments that have holistic touches and are extremely relaxing. There is a spa area for Temazcal bath and herbs native to Mexico’s Mayan Riviera are incorporated in the treatment.

 

If you plan to spend a proper vacation here, don’t forget to boat, fish, horse ride together and most importantly, walks down 7 miles of white sandy beach romantically.

 

Stargazing at National Parks, USA

One of the best places for stargazing is at a national park in the USA. Plan a trip with your introverted loved one for this perfect activity. It’s a romantic place and a good excuse to cuddle with each other as the night goes long and the temperature drops.

 

Focus on the star-lit night sky and enjoy the breath-taking moment with the God-made night spectacle. Know that your date is enjoying this even when the two of you are not talking. Complement each other on how refreshing it is to stay in this quietness and how nice it is to be with your date.

 

Get Lost In Tokyo

Japan is an amazing place for people who like to stay anonymous. No one really bothers what you’re up to, and that is what introverted couples look for.

 

Japanese people are not intrusive. You can keep on weaving through a sea of people without talking to anyone. Take a ride on a bullet train with your loved ones from Tokyo to Mt Fuji and enjoy the beautiful scenery.

 

You are guaranteed to have a peaceful ride with no talks as it is considered bad and rude in Japan to make noise on the train or talk to people. This journey is an extremely energising, scenic and a memorable train ride.

 

Bike around the French Countryside

Are you both more into sports? Do you have strong calf muscles and good speed? Try a biking tour. Such trips appeal introvert people as it offers them time to be alone and spend it with the ones they value. This high-energy activity is a good idea because such adventures become great memories. Getting a workout while riding around the scenic French countryside is a dream come true.

 

This gives the both of you time away from socialising with others. Also, none of you has to feel guilty for eating too many tasty French croissants.

 

Backpack around Europe

This is the ultimate travel place where you both will realise how much the two of you relish each other. If your partner is more like a best friend, then make this date a mixture of love and friendship! Crash at a reasonable hotel with strangers, where it’s not necessary to engage with them. Go ahead, backpack and hike.

 

The best part of Europe is that you truly become a part of nature. It helps you realise that with one good company, you have everything!

 

Picnic at San Francisco

There are tons of beautiful parks in San Francisco. Take your date to a picnic at sunrise, during the day, sunset or night – whenever it’s quiet and calm. Surprise him/her with their favourite drinks and foods. It gives you one-on-one time to know each other better.

 

Find out more on the joys and struggles you and your partner will have based on your personality type: https://www.personality-central.com/relationship

 

Comment below to ask advice from our personality experts on your relationship!

Your Spending Habits According To Your Personality

Author

felyn.yip

Author

Most people like shopping. If you’re in the developed world like the U.S., you’re probably someone who enjoys seasons like Black Friday, Cyber Monday and Christmas, because that’s the season where you have the perfect excuse to shop!

 

However, not everyone likes to shop in the same way. The differences come in what we buy, how much we spend, and where we do our shopping. To some types, shopping is just about acquiring what they need, to others its therapy and even a social event.

 

Interestingly, we can make certain predictions about how we shop according to our personality. Being aware could be the first step for you to modify or adjust the way you shop, so you don’t fall prey to weaknesses! Here is what your personality type says about your spending habits.

 

Extrovert and Introvert Spending Habits

 

Extroverts get energy through interacting with others, they find social activities refreshing and uplifting. Also, they are more likely to be impulsive buyers than Introverts. This means they are usually the ones who organize the shopping trips, the holidays or social outings. Because often take action before thinking about it, they’re more likely to experience buyer’s remorse, and in some cases, get themselves into credit card debts.

 

Introverts, on the other hand, gain energy from spending time alone. They tend to reflect more than act and tend to have narrow views about things that affect them financially. The result is that they may often miss out on financial opportunities that could have possibly improve their fortunes. With normal purchases, they also tend to be more careful, thinking about whether they need something before showing their credit card to the cashier.

 

Both personalities can greatly benefit if they have their trusted and close friends giving them advice when they make crucial financial decisions. By doing this, extroverts would examine their thoughts before jumping in; something that would save them from wasteful and risky buying. Introverts would benefit from getting different viewpoints which they would not have considered otherwise.

 

Sensing and Intuition Spending Habits

 

Typically speaking, Sensors tend to buy products that have immediate, practical benefit, while Intuitives tend to buy products that have long-term, or future significance and impact. For example, Sensors are more likely to spend on delicious food and aesthetically pleasing items. Intuitives tend to be less concerned about how they eat, and if they were to buy luxury goods or aesthetically pleasing items, it often has a personal meaning or a long-term positive benefit.

 

Sensors often have a thing for details. They remember the small things and then to calculate the small expenditures well. However, if they’re not careful, they may end up being penny wise and pound foolish. Intuitives often don’t put their minds on everyday expenditures, seeing them as too small to be concerned about. However, they might spend when someone sells something that promises them a dream or a hope in the future – which may often be false, or sometimes a scam (which they’re more likely to fall prey to).

 

Thinking and Feeling Spending Habits

 

Thinkers use logical analysis when deciding if they need to buy something. They will use their logical mind to justify their purchases. Feelers tend to like to spend in ways that will help others – which means they are more likely to give gifts, treats among others without expecting things in return.

 

Although Thinkers may use their heads to justify their purchases, this doesn’t always mean that they’re right in making those choices. They do, too, make emotional choices, but they will probably make some logic to back these decisions up. Feelers also need to think twice about why they buy things – sometimes they may only spend their money to please others or to gain favor from others. While both ends are okay in moderation, taking it to an extremely often leads to unhealthy spending habits.

 

Judging and Perceiving Spending Habits

 

Judging types tend to be more careful and measured in their spending. They are likely to pay their bills on time, stick to a budget and are less comfortable with unplanned spending.  Perceiving types tend to be more careless with their spending, not budgeting and just deciding at the moment if they want to buy something. It is not to say all Perceiving types are spendthrifts, they just simply don’t budget and take a more spontaneous approach in their spending.

 

The 16 Types and their Spending Inclinations

 

With that, let’s look at how each of the 16 types will tend to be perceived when it comes to spending money.

 

ISTJ – Frugal, Careful Spenders

ISFJ – Frugal, Nest Builders

ESTJ – Status Seekers, Budgeted Spenders

ESFJ – Status Seekers, Budgeted Spenders

INTJ – Calculated, Strategic Resource Allocators

INTP – Casual Spenders, Strategic Resource Allocator

ENTP – Impulsive Spenders, Strategic Resource Allocator

ENTJ – Impulsive, Calculated, Strategic Resource Allocator

INFP – Minimalistic and Casual Spender

INFJ – Planned and Minimalistic Spender

ENFJ – Social, Budgeted Spender

ENFP – Social, Impulsive Spender

ISTP – Casual and Calculated Spender

ISFP – Casual and Thrifty Spender

ESTP – Impulsive, Risk Taking Logical Spender

ESFP – Impulsive, Risk Taking Social Spender

 

Which spending habit are you? Comment below to ask us if you want to know more!

Best Dating Ideas For Extroverts In San Francisco

Author

felyn.yip

Author

So, you’ve fallen in love in the Golden City. You’re dating an Extrovert, and now you’re thinking, what are the best dating ideas that will keep your relationship rolling?

 

Having been married to an Introverted wife for more than twenty years, Dr. Adam Earnheardt, who claims to be an expert in Extrovert-Introvert dating, believes that dating opposites can be challenging.

 

This challenge is more so when partners do not find a balance. One needs to take more effort to figure out what the partner likes to do, seeing that it’s going to be different from yours! Dr. Earnheardt reveals that most extroverts prefer a mix of high energy, large crowd environments and low-key, one-on-one dating.

 

In other words, they love to party! However, when the party’s done, they want your exclusive attention and listening ear.

 

Here are some affordable, best dating ideas in the Golden City:

 

Bowling

Bowling provides a great activity that will suit both Extroverts and Introverts. Your extroverted partner can have fun and perhaps interact with the neighboring lane, while you can sit in the waiting area to take a break when you need to.

 

Bowling alleys in San Francisco such as Presidio will feed the extroverts the energy that they need – while giving you some solitude in brief moments. The beauty of bowling alleys is that they are not so crowded, so when you want to have moments to build intimacy, it won’t be awkward or uncomfortable.

 

Festivals and Concerts

Extroverts love being around people, and nothing provides such an environment like a concert or a festival can. Be on the lookout for the next big concert or festival in San Francisco – there are dozens of them happening. Invite your partner along for a great time – he or she is bound to love it!

 

If you’re really not a concert goer and can’t stand the crowds, look for something in between, like an arts festival where you can still have sufficient personal space, and yet not denying the Extrovert a chance to have fun.

 

Amusement Parks

There are many amusement parks in San Francisco, a great place to take your Extroverted date. Places like Six Flags Discovery Kingdom, Children’s Fairyland, Pixieland Amusement Park are good places for a whole day of fun! It’s a place where there’s a mix of eating, taking rides and interesting conversations while you’re having to queue for those rides.

 

Of course, the quality of conversations in an amusement park can be subpar, but this can be solved by having rest breaks or snack time.

 

Lively Bars or Clubs

These lively bars all over San Francisco provide great environments for Extroverts to enjoy. Of course, moderation is key, as overindulging in nightlife and overdrinking leads to unwanted consequences and terrible hangovers.

 

Having a balance is good. Find a place that you feel comfortable and gives you the space to have a meaningful conversation with your partner. A club or a bar where your favorite tunes are being belted out will provide that golden opportunity for you and your date to dance the night away.

 

Wine tasting

For the ones with refined tastes, bring your Extroverted date for wine tasting in San Francisco in locations such as Napa and Sonoma Wine Country Tour, Alcatraz & Sonoma Valley Wine Tour, among other wine tasting venues and events.

 

This is a great opportunity for you to enjoy the scenery, savor wine and have your quiet moments with one another when the chance arises. Most wine tours are slow paced and easy – so you won’t feel left out of the fun and excitement.

 

Which is your favorite dating spot? Comment below! 

 

Find out how you can interact with your partner:  

https://www.personality-central.com/relationship