ENTJs – Are they really the bad guys?

Author

felyn.yip

Author

Most ENTJs become direct leaders, and because of their style, get accused of being the ‘bad guy’. Truth is, ENTJs know what they want, and they go after it in the most pragmatic way possible. Because of their high confidence in themselves and their ability to make things happen, ENTJs get misconstrued as arrogant, brash and overbearing.

 

This, of course, is off-putting to other personality types. Their determined minds and resolute desire to achieve those goals comes across as ruthless or overbearing because it is so unlike most of the other types.

 

It’s important to know that just because they have a naturally dominant personality, they are not heartless people. They have the same love and desire to help people, but simply express it differently from others.

 

It’s important to recognise that just because they have a dominant personality, ENTJs are not heartless. In fact, they respect when others hold their own about things that matter, so long as it is based on facts that the ENTJ can see.

 

Of course, this is not to say ENTJs have no weaknesses. When they are working, ENTJs can come across as impatient, self-centered or intolerant of others.

 

But today, we want to debunk this myth of them being the bad guys. We want to set straight some misconceptions people have about ENTJs.

 

Misconception: ENTJs are too self-centred to be an effective leader.

 

Driven by their desire for excellence, ENTJs naturally take leadership roles or strive for the highest of positions. They are active communicators and make themselves heard in every situation.

 

People mistake this for self-centeredness, feeling that the ENTJ only speaks for themselves and their own agenda. This may be true for some ENTJs, but also true for many other personalities out there.

 

Truth is, ENTJs think for the overall growth and well-being of organizations, and sometimes the decisions they make can appear sacrificing individuals’ well-being. But all in all, they are utilitarian, looking out for the most benefit for the largest group of people. People may disagree with their approach, but ENTJs are unapologetic about the way they go about solving problems.

 

Misconception: It would be impossible to work with an ENTJ.

ENTJs come across has brash, unforgiving of mistakes and quick to judge. This makes them appear hard to work with. It’s here that people come to believe that it is impossible to work with them.

 

Actually, ENTJs welcome input of any sort, especially one that challenges their viewpoint. ENTJs like being challenged, and when their team or colleagues challenge their viewpoint, they get stimulated and engaged. This is because they believe that any good idea needs to be challenged to be refined and proven.

 

People who understand that find that working with ENTJs to be a delight. There’s a strong exchange of ideas, but nothing is personal. It’s all about the validity of the ideas and whether they work. If you can leave aside your personal feelings, working with ENTJ can be good for your personal and professional growth.

 

Misconception: Being in a relationship with an ENTJ would be impossible.

 

ENTJs are known for being a little out of touch with emotions and can risk being insensitive. However, as a partner, their confidence can serve you well as they are always looking for ways to improve themselves and the way they showcase their love.

 

ENTJs are very open to feedback. If you’re the partner, they will take what you say seriously and look for ways they can improve themselves. This can be rather delightful; how many partners do we know are willing to actively change themselves to be better?

 

Hence, ENTJs often start out rough in the edges. They aren’t the best first dates, or adept at saying the right things at the start. What’s important is that they are committed to the process of improving and becoming better for you.

 

Misconception: You can’t show emotion around an ENTJ.

 

At first sight, ENTJs look ruthless and cannot care less about your feelings. They can look like people without a heart.

 

ENTJs actually have emotions just like everyone else. But because they’re not used to using it in their decision-making, they tend to be more awkward when having to access their emotions or show their emotions. Often, it may come out in an uncontrolled fashion, which is why ENTJs tend to avoid it more. Mature ENTJs, however, know how to manage their emotions together with their logic.

 

Also, in the making of decisions, especially corporate ones, ENTJs don’t see emotions or people’s feelings as a valid point to consider. After all, what is best for the organization is regardless of how people feel about it. This is true from a logical standpoint. However, people who don’t understand this about the ENTJ tend to just label them as emotionless, heartless creatures.

 

All in all, ENTJs have a reputation of being very hard to be with. This is true, if you don’t know how to engage them. In the end, they are like everyone else, doing their best and making sure they are faithful and excellent in their tasks.

 

If you can embrace the natural weakness of the ENTJ, you’ll enjoy their natural strength of leadership, clear goals and resoluteness toward their dreams.

 

Have you understood your ENTJ friend/partner better now? Comment below to share your experience with us! 

 

5 Tips for Dating an ESFP Personality

Author

felyn.yip

Author

Dating an ESFP? Lucky you!

 

ESFPs are fun-loving, charismatic and generous people.  Approachable at all times, they want to make every moment with your count. Nothing too serious, and nothing too heavy. They just love having you and spending time with you.

 

However, ESFPs are often misunderstood. Their playful nature may imply to some that they’re not serious nor committed to the relationship. Yes, that is the case if you’re constantly trying to ‘tie them down’.

 

But if you love your ESFP partner and want to settle down long-term with him or her, here’s what you can do to make them happy:

 

Do fun stuff together.

Think of social and fun stuff to do.  ESFPs like to engage in many things at one time as they are energetic and sociable. Their lives are always packed with enjoyable activities, socialising, friends and work.

Watching a football game with enthusiastic fans or go dancing at a nightclub appeals to them. Nothing too serious, too deep or abstract.

 

Keep them hooked

It’s very easy for ESFPs to lose focus and get bored when there are no new things around them. Because of this, they tend to look elsewhere, and that might also give them a reputation for jumping from one relationship to another. So if you’re dating them, try to keep them hooked and engage in different activities at one time.

It’s a good idea to invite your partner to learn something creative and new like music, dance, cooking, a wine appreciation club or an amateur theatre group. Most of them are also interested in team sports so you can go for a para-jumping group or rowing team for couples. The whole point is to keep them involved in new things so that they don’t look for thrills elsewhere.

 

Don’t grudge them the limelight

ESFPs are most of the times at the centre of groups, work, and social situations.

They are exceedingly popular owing to their easy-going and friendly nature. So don’t be disturbed if once in a while your partner has a calendar packed with events whether it includes you or not.

It might be difficult to understand initially but try to make your own plans with friends or reading a book at home. The point is to give them space and not to make them feel that they only can spend time with you.   

 

Appreciate their generosity

There is no doubt how generous and warm ESFPs are. They will initially sweep you off your feet with their desire to please you. They will go to great lengths to make their partners happy. You are likely to get a lot of surprises from your ESFP partner.

Sometimes, this nature can lead to extravagant buying. Instead of chastising them, appreciate their exuberant natures and generosity. Gently remind them that they can be more moderate in their purchase in the future.  

 

Encourage light discussions

ESFPs like it when they can have fun and enjoyable discussions and avoid places where people are judgemental, critical and negative.

Build an atmosphere which is positive with no conflict. Make sure you don’t use a harsh or critical stance when discussing an issue. Approach any matter constructively and cooperatively to encourage non-judgmental dialogue.

 

Are you an ESFP? Share this post with your friend, so they learn more about you!

 

Dating an ESFP? Comment on this post to share your experience or share your story in the Story section of the website!

6 Travel Experiences for Introverted Dating Couples

Author

felyn.yip

Author

Many introverted couples turn out to have a successful long-term relationship usually because they share similar interests and level of understanding.

Planning travel places require a conversation between the couple as to which places will fuel and recharge both of you. Well, we’ve made things easier for you.

Here’s a guide to 6 best travel experiences for introverted dating couples:

 

Beach getaway at Viceroy Riviera Maya

It is a secluded escape on the Caribbean Sea in Mexico with Mayan-inspired spa treatments and calm surroundings. Hit this place when it’s not crowded.

 

If you have a good budget, go for a luxury villa with private pool and outdoor terrace. The villas are surrounded by tropical jungle gardens and are private. This unique resort is a great place to visit and the most romantic beach getaways in Mexico.

 

Treat your partner and send them to spa treatments that have holistic touches and are extremely relaxing. There is a spa area for Temazcal bath and herbs native to Mexico’s Mayan Riviera are incorporated in the treatment.

 

If you plan to spend a proper vacation here, don’t forget to boat, fish, horse ride together and most importantly, walks down 7 miles of white sandy beach romantically.

 

Stargazing at National Parks, USA

One of the best places for stargazing is at a national park in the USA. Plan a trip with your introverted loved one for this perfect activity. It’s a romantic place and a good excuse to cuddle with each other as the night goes long and the temperature drops.

 

Focus on the star-lit night sky and enjoy the breath-taking moment with the God-made night spectacle. Know that your date is enjoying this even when the two of you are not talking. Complement each other on how refreshing it is to stay in this quietness and how nice it is to be with your date.

 

Get Lost In Tokyo

Japan is an amazing place for people who like to stay anonymous. No one really bothers what you’re up to, and that is what introverted couples look for.

 

Japanese people are not intrusive. You can keep on weaving through a sea of people without talking to anyone. Take a ride on a bullet train with your loved ones from Tokyo to Mt Fuji and enjoy the beautiful scenery.

 

You are guaranteed to have a peaceful ride with no talks as it is considered bad and rude in Japan to make noise on the train or talk to people. This journey is an extremely energising, scenic and a memorable train ride.

 

Bike around the French Countryside

Are you both more into sports? Do you have strong calf muscles and good speed? Try a biking tour. Such trips appeal introvert people as it offers them time to be alone and spend it with the ones they value. This high-energy activity is a good idea because such adventures become great memories. Getting a workout while riding around the scenic French countryside is a dream come true.

 

This gives the both of you time away from socialising with others. Also, none of you has to feel guilty for eating too many tasty French croissants.

 

Backpack around Europe

This is the ultimate travel place where you both will realise how much the two of you relish each other. If your partner is more like a best friend, then make this date a mixture of love and friendship! Crash at a reasonable hotel with strangers, where it’s not necessary to engage with them. Go ahead, backpack and hike.

 

The best part of Europe is that you truly become a part of nature. It helps you realise that with one good company, you have everything!

 

Picnic at San Francisco

There are tons of beautiful parks in San Francisco. Take your date to a picnic at sunrise, during the day, sunset or night – whenever it’s quiet and calm. Surprise him/her with their favourite drinks and foods. It gives you one-on-one time to know each other better.

 

Find out more on the joys and struggles you and your partner will have based on your personality type: https://www.personality-central.com/relationship

 

Comment below to ask advice from our personality experts on your relationship!

Best Dating Ideas For Extroverts In San Francisco

Author

felyn.yip

Author

So, you’ve fallen in love in the Golden City. You’re dating an Extrovert, and now you’re thinking, what are the best dating ideas that will keep your relationship rolling?

 

Having been married to an Introverted wife for more than twenty years, Dr. Adam Earnheardt, who claims to be an expert in Extrovert-Introvert dating, believes that dating opposites can be challenging.

 

This challenge is more so when partners do not find a balance. One needs to take more effort to figure out what the partner likes to do, seeing that it’s going to be different from yours! Dr. Earnheardt reveals that most extroverts prefer a mix of high energy, large crowd environments and low-key, one-on-one dating.

 

In other words, they love to party! However, when the party’s done, they want your exclusive attention and listening ear.

 

Here are some affordable, best dating ideas in the Golden City:

 

Bowling

Bowling provides a great activity that will suit both Extroverts and Introverts. Your extroverted partner can have fun and perhaps interact with the neighboring lane, while you can sit in the waiting area to take a break when you need to.

 

Bowling alleys in San Francisco such as Presidio will feed the extroverts the energy that they need – while giving you some solitude in brief moments. The beauty of bowling alleys is that they are not so crowded, so when you want to have moments to build intimacy, it won’t be awkward or uncomfortable.

 

Festivals and Concerts

Extroverts love being around people, and nothing provides such an environment like a concert or a festival can. Be on the lookout for the next big concert or festival in San Francisco – there are dozens of them happening. Invite your partner along for a great time – he or she is bound to love it!

 

If you’re really not a concert goer and can’t stand the crowds, look for something in between, like an arts festival where you can still have sufficient personal space, and yet not denying the Extrovert a chance to have fun.

 

Amusement Parks

There are many amusement parks in San Francisco, a great place to take your Extroverted date. Places like Six Flags Discovery Kingdom, Children’s Fairyland, Pixieland Amusement Park are good places for a whole day of fun! It’s a place where there’s a mix of eating, taking rides and interesting conversations while you’re having to queue for those rides.

 

Of course, the quality of conversations in an amusement park can be subpar, but this can be solved by having rest breaks or snack time.

 

Lively Bars or Clubs

These lively bars all over San Francisco provide great environments for Extroverts to enjoy. Of course, moderation is key, as overindulging in nightlife and overdrinking leads to unwanted consequences and terrible hangovers.

 

Having a balance is good. Find a place that you feel comfortable and gives you the space to have a meaningful conversation with your partner. A club or a bar where your favorite tunes are being belted out will provide that golden opportunity for you and your date to dance the night away.

 

Wine tasting

For the ones with refined tastes, bring your Extroverted date for wine tasting in San Francisco in locations such as Napa and Sonoma Wine Country Tour, Alcatraz & Sonoma Valley Wine Tour, among other wine tasting venues and events.

 

This is a great opportunity for you to enjoy the scenery, savor wine and have your quiet moments with one another when the chance arises. Most wine tours are slow paced and easy – so you won’t feel left out of the fun and excitement.

 

Which is your favorite dating spot? Comment below! 

 

Find out how you can interact with your partner:  

https://www.personality-central.com/relationship

7 Things INFJs want you to know about Them

Author

Ethan Lin

Author

Curious about INFJs? Here are 7 things INFJs want you to know about them – INFJs are the rarest personality type out of all the sixteen. Because they are so complex and rare in numbers, they are often misunderstood.

 

In truth, INFJs are awesome people. They strive to make a positive impact on those around them and are always trying to help others in any way. They are naturally a calm and sincere connector, and attract others to them because of their sensitivity to the feelings of those around them.

 

We wanted to take an in-depth look at what it’s like to be an INFJ. To do that, we’ve compiled some common things that every INFJ wishes they could share so that you can understand their unique personality. After all, they aren’t people that like to explain themselves all the time.

 

“Sometimes I forget to take care of myself.”

 

Because I am constantly looking to protect the feelings of others and take care of those around me, I can sometimes forget about my own needs.

 

I can even feel guilty when my life is doing fine and someone I love is going through a hard time.

 

As such, I can sometimes get burnt out because I don’t make time for myself, which is why I need to be reminded by those who love me to take care of myself.

 

“I believe I can make a change in the world.”

 

I see so many negative things going on in the world, and I feel deeply about them. Sometimes, I think the world is so corrupted and evil and I don’t know how to start to change it.

 

But I want to right them. I want to right all the wrongs in the world. I want people to feel loved and accepted no matter who they are.

 

“I have a hard time opening up.”

 

I find it hard to share things about myself. Honestly, I don’t know why – perhaps I don’t want people to be burdened with my thoughts and feelings.

 

However, I’m more than happy to hear about you, and what you’re going through. I want to bear that burden with you.

 

“I can be picky.”

 

I can be picky in all aspects of life, including in finding a romantic partner.
Some may call me a “perfectionist,” and I have a hard time settling for anything less than I think I deserve. This is my way protect my heart from being hurt.

 

“I tend to have extremes.”

 

I live on two ends of the spectrum. I’m either extremely passionate about something or I’m completely indifferent.

 

I believe that life is about doing things you love, enjoy and care about. And for those that I do, I always give 101% to them. For those I don’t, I tend not to give mind to it.

 

Of course, if work requires me to be responsible, you’ll be sure I’m on it. Responsibility weighs high in my value scale.

 

“I stand behind my values.”

 

I know what I believe, and I stand strongly behind my values. I am not easily swayed and usually not open to changing those beliefs. Don’t try to change how I think – you’re likely not to succeed.

 

“I feel things deeply.”

 

I feel deeply, meaning it can take me a long time to forgive and forget.

 

Sometimes, if I am hurt very badly, I will turn away from that person or relationship permanently to protect my heart and feelings.

 

Are you an INFJ? If so, did this article accurately describe you?

 

Are you great friends with an INFJ? Did this article describe your friend well?

 

Leave your thoughts on the comment box below.

5 Best Dating Spots for INFPs in New York City

Author

Ethan Lin

Author

The INFP personality type is one of a kind and is known for being an idealist personality. They are intuitive, dreamers, mediators; they have their moral codes and are a rare type that only a few individuals possess.

 

But some of the main things one should know when dating an INFP is that they like private dates, or those with their close friends. Parties or big gatherings with strangers are usually not their cup of tea.

 

But what happens if you’re an Introvert in one of the most metropolitan cities in the world? The whole of New York City looks bustling and alive with activity – where can an Introvert like the INFP go to ‘hide’ in a city like that?

 

Here is a guide for five best dating spots for INFP:

 

1. Tentrr at Arlo SoHo

INFP dating spots NYC
Source: Metro US

 

The boutique hotel Tentrr situated at 231 Hudson Street consists of five large camps: two on the roof and three in the courtyard. It is a perfect place to spend some alone time with your partner in beautiful tents. Each tent is decorated impeccably.

 

There are also fake fireplaces, picnic tables, shot skis to give it an even more perfect look.

Good conversation, the hot toddies, enjoying a cup of coffee in Adirondack chairs is truly mesmerizing.

 

 

2. Mount Loretto Unique Area

Dating INFP NYC
Source: PP_jeh

 

Surprise your INFP love and take him/her to Staten Island (20 Kenny Road, Staten Island).

This place is secluded and a great spot for catching up with long chit chats or discussions and bird watching. It also has three hiking trails and each of its leads to a coastline, freshwater wetlands as well as grasslands that are all within city limits.

 

If you both dig a quiet and calm place, then congratulations! This should be your new favourite spot!

 

 

3. Wine Cellar

NYC INFP Dating
Source: TripAdvisor

 

Treat your date with an unforgettable, intimate dining experience at 21 West 52nd Street Wine Cellar.

 

If you both are INFPs, this place takes secrecy to another level. The dining room has an exquisite brick-wall door that was designed to be invisible.

 

Indulge in amazing American cuisine and top off your joy with great wines. You are likely to have a great time with your date as the two of you enjoy each other’s company during a guided tour of the actual cellar.

 

Some of the great Richard Nixon’s wines are still ageing there!

 

 

4. Central Park love notes

NY Dating INFP
Source: EdYourdon

 

This one just had to be in the list hands down!

 

Hold your partner’s hand and take a stroll around Central Park. Note that INFPs value close relationships and dating them mean you need to show that you care. In the case where you both are of the same personality type, this spot will make the two of you closer.

 

Conservatory Garden, Belvedere Castle, boat rides below Bow Bridge, and such all stands next to the Central Park as it is truly a magical place be its winter season, summer, fall or even spring.

 

There are 9000 benches in the park out of which 4500 have been engraved with memories of marriage proposals, love, anniversary in the form of figures and words. Till the two of you are getting there, this can be a romantic scavenger hunt and a great reminder that every city has a story and the story of NYC lies here! 

 

 

5. The Cloisters

Dating NYC INFP
Source: Christopher Down

 

The last best dating spot we’ve picked up for INFPs is The Cloisters which is an old monastery. It is situated at the upper Manhattan with great views from parks that were made from roaming and quiet neighbourhood.  But most importantly, it consists of artefacts and medieval art.

 

Beaches and pools are always crowded. The Cloisters, on the other hand, is extremely peaceful and should be a must visit spot in your list even in summers. The Cloisters highlights architecture and medieval art as the branch of The Metropolitan Museum of Art.

 

Go ahead and learn about the famed unicorn tapestries; have a look at the stained glasses, the museum’s collection of modern art and artefacts of Ancient Rome. It is a true opportunity to show and share your culture with the one you love.

 

Enjoy a small picnic with a drink in the medieval gardens or stop by a small eatery to share a cup of tea for a wonderful evening as your girl praises you for being a gem.

 

 

 

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3 Things You Need to Know Before Dating an ENTP

Author

Ethan Lin

Author

So you’re dating an ENTP… and you might be having trouble reconciling the charismatic persona and the kinda irritating challenges that they put you through. Many people who date ENTP have the same experience.

They were attracted to their ENTP partner’s charisma and natural confidence around people. They think to themselves, “Wow, this is someone who’s sure of themselves! I sure can get with someone like that.”

 

Eventually, when they get together, they see another side of the ENTP. They see the ENTP challenging their every thought or idea… they see their egos being smashed or quashed by the confident ENTPs, who don’t seem to care about their feelings.

 

Now, what’s really going through the ENTP’s mind? Are they really jerks or just simply who they are? Before we even get to the level of trying to understand these enigmatic characters, here are a few survival tips on dating ENTPs:

 

Give them space to pursue their interests

ENTPs are hyped up by new ideas – and put all their energies into a brilliant idea to make it happen. Sometimes they make sure it comes to pass, while often times, before they finish, another idea catches their attention.

 

As someone dating them, it’s important that you encourage those dreams; don’t be a wet blanket and tell them it won’t work. In fact, if you do, they’re more than likely to prove you wrong, and they’ll feel you don’t support or love them.

 

So, take an interest in those ideas, and then if you’re the planning type, you can even support them by putting all these ideas into a concrete action plan. In the end, most of these ideas probably wont work out, but for the ones that work out often make them good money or give them high achievement.

 

Get used to the challenges

 

ENTPs are smooth talkers and quick thinkers. They like examining multiple theories and then having a discussion with their partners about it. It may look like they’re irritating you or trying to force you into a conflict, but really, they just want someone to indulge their ideas with.

 

If you are someone who can engage them intellectually, then even better. ENTPs love interacting with intellectual people and they find it a turn on to have a debate with one.

 

Feel free to criticize their ideas, and remember its not personal. Don’t make it so. It’s never about you or him, most of the time it’s about the idea. While they like debate, they hate emotional conflicts, which they deem to be illogical and pointless.

 

Be ready to grow with them

If you want a long-term relationship with an ENTP, be ready to grow with them.

 

ENTPs are always seeking ways to improve themselves and their standard of living. They will pursue new ideas, new learnings, new education just so that they can be a better version of themselves. They will appreciate a partner who is growth-oriented too, and will join the ENTPs on the journey of becoming better.

 

Stagnation, to them, is a curse. They dislike people who get so comfortable with life and do not seek for more. If they are in a relationship with a stagnant person, after a while, breaking up comes into their mind.

 

Another way they show their desire to improve is their natural need to be brutally honest with people. If you’re dating an ENTP, you must be secure enough in yourself to be able to take the criticisms from ENTPs. It is often helpful, if you want to be a better person, but if you’re not secure, you’ll find those words offensive or hurtful.

 

Learn more about the ENTP

 

These are just some simple tips that will keep the relationship with the ENTP going. However, if you’re getting serious with him/her, then it’s time for you to explore deeper understanding about them here.

 

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