ISFP – INFP Relationship

ISFP - INFP Relationship

Joys and Struggles

This section ISFP - INFP relationship is about how these two personality types come together in a relationship. Specifically, we will be looking at the joys of this relationship as well as the struggles this relationship may have.

The ISFP - INFP relationship has 3 preference similarities and 1 preference difference. Regardless of the number of similarities and differences, each personality combination will have its unique set of challenges. We will look at each of the 4 preferences individually:


  • Introverts have a natural mutual respect of each other’s private time and space; both will know the need for the occasional solitude and quiet.
  • In recreation, both enjoy that alone time and at the most with a close group of friends; both do not like big social gatherings or parties.
  • If they have a common interest, introverts will enjoy those long, deep meaningful conversations they can have with one another.
  • Both are naturally good listeners; they will enjoy taking turns to share and asking questions to one another.
  • Without a common interest, they may find it challenging to keep the conversation going. In a short while, they may find they run out of things to talk about.
  • Because both enjoy the silence so much, they may take communication for granted and not share their feelings with each other often enough.
  • May lack a support network if both do not belong to a community because of their lack of desire to socialize.


  • Sensors enjoys the insightful and brilliant Intuitive and seeing things from a big picture, strategic perspective relative to theirs.
  • Sensors are also likely fascinated by the outlandish imagination of the Intuitive; with big dreams and visions.
  • Intuitives will appreciate the Sensors attention to detail in everyday living; Sensors bring Intuitives down to earth to common sense.
  • While not true for all Sensors, Sensors dress themselves and groom themselves relatively well; this is something that Intuitives will appreciate and admire.
  • May find it a challenge to have a common topic for discussion; Sensors enjoy talking about everyday happenings while Intuitive enjoys ideas, trends and theories. These differences in interest may mean the couple may find little or no chemistry.
  • Sensors are more past and present focused while Intuitives tend to be more future oriented; This means that Sensors will take references from past experiences and present facts to make a decision, while Intuitives are more likely to take into account future possibilities when doing so. – This may lead to different conclusions with available information.
  • Sensors may find Intuitives’ lack of interest in everyday living and managing household tasks to be frustrating; they don’t understand why Intuitives are always ‘in their heads’, pondering about the deep things of life while they are the ones taking care of the duties of the household.


  • Both parties are attracted to each other’s warmth, sensitivity and kindness to each other’s needs.
  • Both will likely enjoy their expressiveness and natural affection with each other.
  • Both Feeling types tend to recognize and consider their partner’s needs and try to meet them. Hence there is usually high level of harmony in the relationship.
  • Because both value some level of harmony, they may store up unhappy feelings inside and not share openly.
  • They may avoid necessary conflict and disagreements; this is unhealthy in the long run for the quality of the relationship.
  • Because both may decisions with their personal values, they may sometimes overlook logical consequences of certain actions.


  • Both parties enjoy being spontaneous to changing circumstances and keeping their options open without seeing the need to come to a decision.
  • Both tend to be okay with going with the flow; for the most part, daily decisions like eating locations or recreational activities are decided on a whim. Little conflict over these issues.
  • Both parties are comfortable with disorganization in the household; the household will probably be messy, and both are perfectly fine with it.
  • Both parties tend to be less consistent in performing routine household tasks like cleaning the house, doing the laundry and paying the bills.
  • However, since these activities are a necessary evil, the partner that tries to do these tasks consistently may feel frustrated and maybe resentful.
  • Also, because both parties want to keep their options open, they are likely to procrastinate making important decisions, sometimes even pushing it away until they make none.


Here’s how ISFPs and INFPs can relate to each other better:

Reaching out to the ISFP as an INFP
  • Invite your partner to share – Your partner is quiet and prefers not to speak unless with very close partners. Invite your partner to talk by asking thoughtful questions. 
  • Keep it light-hearted – Don’t get too ‘deep’ or philosophical with them. Your partner likes light-hearted chats. 
  • Keep it simple – Your tendency to talk about abstract theories or the big picture may make it hard for your partner to understand. Focus on making the complex simple and breaking the big picture into actionable steps. 
  • Be sensitive – Be sensitive to your partner’s feelings. Your partner will not readily say it if he/she has been offended or hurt by your words. Apologize where necessary. 
  • Give space – Sometimes, your partner needs space alone. Don’t ask your partner why, nor ask him/her to explain. Just give it.
Reaching out to the INFP as an ISFP
  • Share openly – Be open to sharing your thoughts and feelings with your partner, for he/she is likely to feel connected to you when you do. 
  • Be authentic – Your partner enjoys that authentic connection that comes from open-hearted sharing from both sides. Be open about your challenges. 
  • Get to the gist of the issue – Your partner is likely to get you rather quickly. Share the gist of the matter and let your partner ask questions to clarify things. 
  • Support your partner’s dreams – Your partner has hopes and dreams that he/she hopes can be fulfilled; learn about them and then find practical ways you can support your partner. 
  • Focus on developing people – Focus on how your ideas to your partner can help develop others emotionally, spiritually and mentally.

This is a summary of the joys and pains of the ISFP – INFP relationship.

However, personality dynamics are more complex than this. It does not just extend to the difference or similarity in individual preferences but goes deeper than that.