INFP – ENFP Relationship

INFP - ENFP Relationship

Joys and Struggles

This section INFP - ENFP relationship is about how these two personality types come together in a relationship. Specifically, we will be looking at the joys of this relationship as well as the struggles this relationship may have.

The INFP - ENFP relationship has 3 preference similarities and 1 preference difference. Regardless of the number of similarities and differences, each personality combination will have its unique set of challenges. We will look at each of the 4 preferences individually:


  • Are attracted by each other’s difference in energy levels. Extroverts appreciate the calm and steady demeanor of the Introvert, while Introverts enjoy the hearty and bubbly Extrovert.
  • Extrovert enjoys that there is an active listening ear in the Introvert, always ready to listen to his thoughts and rants.
  • Introvert enjoys that the Extrovert takes social leadership in most occasions, connecting them to new friends and people that they otherwise would be too shy to approach.
  • Extroverts, however, may find that the Introvert is too quiet and communicates too little with nothing to share. They may feel Introverts are boring, or just disinterested in talking to them.
  • Introverts may find that Extroverts are too loud and talk too much without listening to them. An Introvert may feel neglected and unheard by Extroverts because they will only share if asked – and Extroverts usually don’t ask.
  • On the weekends, Extroverts enjoy heading out for social activities or other high stimulation activities to relax while Introverts prefer staying home or at the most have some quiet activity with close friends. This difference in preference will sometimes lead to dissatisfaction.


  • Because both parties enjoy discussing big ideas, possibilities and global issues, they will usually find a certain attraction to each other.
  • This is especially if they have similar viewpoints on certain issues, they will find chemistry with each other.
  • Both tend to enjoy each other’s uniqueness, not just in viewpoints but also in fashion, tastes and so on.
  • Because both parties enjoy talking about the future, their conversations will more often revolve around future hopes and dreams and exciting possibilities.
  • However, they may lack interest in everyday living, hence if they are a married couple, household duties may tend to be neglected.
  • Even if they attempt to take care of household, they may still miss important details in its maintenance.
  • The partner that has to be constantly responsible for the everyday maintenance may feel resentment or unfulfilled.
  • A good balance can be achieved with proper delegation of duties or with the hiring of a domestic helper.


  • Both parties are attracted to each other’s warmth, sensitivity and kindness to each other’s needs.
  • Both will likely enjoy their expressiveness and natural affection with each other.
  • Both Feeling types tend to recognize and consider their partner’s needs and try to meet them. Hence there is usually high level of harmony in the relationship.
  • Because both value some level of harmony, they may store up unhappy feelings inside and not share openly.
  • They may avoid necessary conflict and disagreements; this is unhealthy in the long run for the quality of the relationship.
  • Because both may decisions with their personal values, they may sometimes overlook logical consequences of certain actions.


  • Both parties enjoy being spontaneous to changing circumstances and keeping their options open without seeing the need to come to a decision.
  • Both tend to be okay with going with the flow; for the most part, daily decisions like eating locations or recreational activities are decided on a whim. Little conflict over these issues.
  • Both parties are comfortable with disorganization in the household; the household will probably be messy, and both are perfectly fine with it.
  • Both parties tend to be less consistent in performing routine household tasks like cleaning the house, doing the laundry and paying the bills.
  • However, since these activities are a necessary evil, the partner that tries to do these tasks consistently may feel frustrated and maybe resentful.
  • Also, because both parties want to keep their options open, they are likely to procrastinate making important decisions, sometimes even pushing it away until they make none.


Here’s how INFPs and ENFPs can relate to each other better:

Reaching out to the INFP as an ENFP
  • Allow your partner to share – While you often have little issue sharing your thoughts and feelings, remember to give space for your partner to share. Be fully present when listening. 
  • Be patient – Don’t rush things or be distracted by your surroundings if you want to engage your partner. Be patient and listen as attentively as possible. 
  • Allow each other the space to express your values – You and your partner have strong values you hold to, but it may differ. When it comes down to it, sometimes it may be better to agree to disagree. 
  • Support your partner’s dreams – Learn about your partner’s dreams and visions for the future, and find ways to encourage and support them. 
  • Follow through – Your lack of follow through is perceived as a lack of integrity by your partner. Remember to stick to your plans and follow through.
Reaching out to the ENFP as an INFP
  • Speak up – Your parnter is an energetic person who may unconsciously dominate a conversation. If there’s something important you need to say, intentionally speak up. 
  • Have fun – Your parnter loves to have fun – and the best way to connect is to do something exciting, fun or new with him/her. 
  • Agree to disagree – Your parnter, like you, can be very passionate about certain causes. Sometimes you may be in opposing end of these causes. Agree to disagree, but don’t let it affect your relationship. 
  • Be warm and affirming – No matter how emotional or passionate you feel about something, be careful not to become cutting or offensive in your words. 
  • Expect change – Your parnter is a living expression of spontaneity. Expect changes to plans, ideas, schedules and decisions. Be patient with him/her.

This is a summary of the joys and pains of the INFP – ENFP relationship.

However, personality dynamics are more complex than this. It does not just extend to the difference or similarity in individual preferences but goes deeper than that.