Joys and Struggles
This section ISTJ-ISFJ relationship is about how these two personality types come together in a relationship. Specifically, we will be looking at the joys of this relationship as well as the struggles this relationship may have.
The ISTJ-ISFJ relationship has 3 preference similarities and 1 preference differences. Regardless of the number of similarities and differences, each personality combination will have its unique set of challenges. We will look at each of the 4 preferences individually:
- Introverts have a natural mutual respect of each other's private time and space; both will know the need for the occasional solitude and quiet.
- In recreation, both enjoy that alone time and at the most with a close group of friends; both do not like big social gatherings or parties.
- If they have a common interest, introverts will enjoy those long, deep meaningful conversations they can have with one another.
- Both are naturally good listeners; they will enjoy taking turns to share and asking questions to one another.
- Without a common interest, they may find it challenging to keep the conversation going. In a short while, they may find they run out of things to talk about.
- Because both enjoy the silence so much, they may take communication for granted and not share their feelings with each other often enough.
- May lack a support network if both do not belong to a community because of their lack of desire to socialize.
- Will likely enjoy similar topics in conversation, mainly about past and present happenings related to, people they've met, places they've been, experiences they seen.
- Both like language simple, straightforward and literal; will likely 'click' with each other.
- Because both tend to live in the present, household duties are less likely to be neglected. However the more passive ones may still not perform them.
- Although both enjoy Sensory details, the couple may disagree on specifics in the household: i.e. what colour should the wall be, where should the vase be placed.
- In times of crises, both partners tend to over-worry or think up worst case scenarios, which is unproductive and sometimes cause destructive conflict between the couple.
- In such cases, they may lack the future looking vision that will help them through the crisis.
- Thinker will be attracted to the Feeler's compassion and warmth toward Thinker and others, which Thinker may find lacking in self.
- Feeler is attracted to the objective, tough-minded Thinker who can take and give criticism without taking offense.
- The Thinker-Feeler partnership will provide all rounded perspectives, considering people, values and logical consequences when making important decisions.
- Thinkers may hurt Feelers with their straightforward and sometimes tactless words; Feelers tend to take words personally; so when the Thinker provides negative feedback, it always evokes a larger than expected reaction from the Feeler.
- Thinkers may not understand the Feeler's desire for harmony and hence avoidance of conflict. Thinkers often misinterpret Feeler's behavior and deem them complicated.
- Feelers also tend to show affection much more naturally and sometimes they may feel their Thinking counterparts don't show enough of it; they may feel unfulfilled in the relationship.
- Because both value organization, they are likely to have a neat and tidy household with clear rules and standards, something which both parties will prefer.
- They are likely also to plan their schedules with each other, with little or no issue with unnecessary last minute changes.
- They will also appreciate their partner's ability to keep up with the demands of everyday living and stay on top.
- They will likely be strong together with budgeting, there will be little or no issues with planning out finances together.
- Even though both parties may have standards in the household, they may have very different standards.
- Because both tend to be opinionated, their arguments and quarrels may be more intense. Both may refuse to budge on their standards and compromise.
- Both parties like to settle things; this means that sometimes they may make premature decisions without sufficiently considering their alternative options.
This is a summary of the joys and pains of the ISTJ-ISFJ relationship.
However, personality dynamics are more
complex than this. It does not just extend to the difference or similarity in
individual preferences but goes deeper than that.
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